Friday, September 30, 2011

song today

i have a lot on my mind. but when i write it all down it looks boring to read.
my blog must be painfully boring because no one reads it anymore and no one ever comments. it kind of bothers me how no one ever comments. whatteevver. i guess blogging has died.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

as of lately ::

the beat of the week ~~

so here i am.
busy as a bee.

work 7 days a week.
at the office on days . coffee on weekends.
herb school, friends, family, cleaning, etsy & cuddlin my cat in the time i have left over.
money saving. car fixing. school planning. music finding. pumpkin craving. thrift shopping. healthy eating. positive step taking.

i'm also getting glasses ! because i actually need them. i always knew i did. they are ... so perfect for me. can't wait to show them off. the perks of working at an optometrist office. i do exams on people & all that fun stuff. it really is fun, i'm not being sarcastic. i love my job.

last weekend my great pal brooke & i decided to be tourists in our own town: Camino aka Apple Hill. it was probably the best idea we've ever had. because it was the best day ever. we went to Kids Inc for their delicious pies for breakfast. then we dinked around at various other farms & got ourselves some souvenirs . we then decided to go to Boeger Winery for some wine tasting & a bottle of Boeger Hangtown Gold on the grass for brunch. delicious & peaceful!
Then we went to some other farms & decided to hit up good ol' Jack Russell Brewery because they had tents & live music... nice nice. we decided to each get a hotdog .. (brooke got veggie) & it was so delicious. we watched a man blow glass with special glasses .
then our last stop was Argyres Orchards for face painting! we decided it was a must. Brooke got lady bugs & bumble bees with vines & i got a unicorn & star bursts. so awesome.
all in all... it was a spectacular day.


Friday, September 16, 2011


does that even begin to describe.... what is my life... ???

not even close.
try going from having a car, a family, a roof, a BED, a cat, a ... everything really.
to having nothing
virtually nothing

every "less" you can think of.
well .. thats me. monday was the day my life caught up with me.

i have a lot of advice for my readers out there. if i have any. i really cant tell at this point. i haven't gotten comments or input or anything for the longest time. and yet i still keep writing. in vain obviously. and trust me, that is the least of my worries these days. maybe my horrible lifestyle has been exuding from my pores & my aura this entire time keeping people away? who knows.

advice #1 - don't ever under estimate true friends.
you think you have all these pals & friends and whatnot. but when things get real dirty & rough & intense... its all about who is still standing there waiting for you. who are the people who are gonna drop whats going on with them to help YOU? you really learn who the true, life long, honest, incredible hearted, & loving friends are. you separate whats real from whats just... an illusion. my friends have been incredible , supportive, there for me & helping beyond explanation. i don't know how i will ever return the favor. buying you guys dinner & food just doesn't seem to suffice. (altho i know you guys all enjoy that haha!)

#2 - seriously. learn when to shut up. s h u t u p . your stupid, over reacting, cynical, rude, bitchy, snide, smart ass, annoying words really DONT need to be said all the time. can't you learn to shut up? really? by this point can't you recognize when you are digging a really deep & ridiculous hole for yourself for NO REASON!!!/?? just be quiet ! you will make a huge fool out of yourself.
"If you can't say something nice .... don't say nothing at all" - Thumper

#3 - don't let another persons poison seep into your life, mind, body & soul. don't, in turn, become a poison yourself. listen to others around you who have concern. warnings are there for a reason. RUN . if you get the smallest inkling of poison ... get out. it will consume you . you won't even realize it.

#4 - learn to admit when you are wrong. seriously . unless you want to be miserable and stubborn forever. have fun with that.
I WAS WRONG! i admit it. so so so so incredibly horribly stupidly wrong. about everything.

i could give advice for hours right now. but i'm tired. i work in the morning. my back hurts because . i am in this amazingly comfortable bed.
but take my advice. and just DO IT. do everything i say.
if the world would do as i say ... it would be perfect. just don't do what i do. because clearly its not a good idea. learn from your mistakes... oooh hell. if you don't you are so dense.


Saturday, September 10, 2011

new things on my etsy ....

do i make a good sales girl with this face?

Friday, September 2, 2011

yellowstone / jackson hole

how silly we are. walking on this wooden boardwalk gazing into this mesmerizing hot springs & geysers . so fascinating & mysterious to us. walking with out protection against these erie forces of the earth. on this wooden board walk ... thinking it makes us safe. when at any given moment a new geyser could erupt right under you. boiling you to infinity.
yet we mosey along thinking we are safe because of this wooden path, that weaves us in and around and about these spectacular natural beauties.

such a mysterious place . erie & thought provoking. all of this glory & wonder. these unique THINGS. pools of mineral water boiling from the earth. flowing constantly. always alive with activity from deep underground. we walk around in awe gazing into these wondrous creations , when right beneath our feet a super volcano is brewing, active but not active enough to explode with force over this earth. its amazing to wrap your mind around. the differences in color, shape, force & flow of each pool & geyser is fascinating. not one the same.

the smell is a putrid, repugnant smell. yet it lures you in and makes you take a deep breath. you can't decide whether its awful or refreshing. the mixture of heat, water & minerals from deep with in the earth ... when the wind blows over the pools and pushes the steam and smell onto your body you get the chills. your body doesn't know what to feel. cold? hot? goosebumps and heat waves all at once. the changes in temperature are so quick that you don't have time to adjust. you just stand there ... letting the breeze flow over you . eyes closed , arms out , hair flowing, mind removed. nothing else matters ... just that feeling , that smell, that sight.

the colors and movements of each pool is enchanting. i want to mimic each one into my own personal spa. i want to reach out and dip my finger into them. the soft touch of pure mineral water. the layers chroma fanning out over the area making unique rainbows. the constant changes and flow leave it different every second. you will never fixate on the same thing ever again.

the pictures taken never seem to portray the right vision your own eyes witness. the beauty and intensity of each sight is beyond explanation. they are the only way to remember what you saw. because your memories almost don't suffice. it was so much to take in that your mind blurs each sight together ..... the mist, the movement, the smell, the energy. makes you feel peaceful and removed. its incredible to be able to see something that has the potential to completely annihilate the world.

grand prismatic

chromatic spring

midway geyser basin

old faithful

this song right now

Chad Valley - Now That I'm Real (How Does It Feel)