electric

I went to San Francisco again this past weekend. I hadn't been since January when I had a Gatsby style weekend with my girl friend Erin. Dang we had fun. If I could do that weekend over again, I would do two things differently: 1. I would have worn sequin tops. 2. Put more flowers on the deck.

I'll have to let her know about my revisions and see if she's down to do it all over again. We even got Cafe XO breakfast delivered to us in bed by PostMates. 

But this most recent weekend was of course a whole other arena of fun. Since, World Cup is on. I strolled into town at some point, after staying the night in Sacramento with Jackie. Jackie and I went and got some Mexican food and had blackberry margaritas. And by that I mean it was practically just tequila with a giant blackberry floating in it. WHOA, whew that was strong. Then we went to get a glass of wine. We sat outside and I probably cussed too loudly and other people probably noticed. I have bad habits. Whatever. It was a lovely evening out with my girl! Oh yeah, but San Francisco. 

I met up with Zach and we drank while watching the game. Afterward we went to Sutro Bath ruins. It is SUCH a weird place. jeeeeesus. It's really so strange. He let me take his photo there. 

I went to dinner with Meg & Adrienne and we had a lovely meal. Then we went back to her place and drank a little bit and enjoyed ourselves. I love them.

then Meg & I went "home" and crashed early. Giggled for a bit in the dark, of course. As we girls do. About how we are grandmas, going to bed early on a Saturday. How we've done that pretty much every single time. And how we don't care because we like sleep WAY more than anything else the night may have to offer in the city. She's a great friend.

Woke up, went and got myself from of my favorite breakfast from Cafe XO. I don't even know why I like it so much. It just tastes good. It reminds me of Kate and Tim. We were the best team ever. I miss them. I watched the Mexico v Holland game. Mexico lost, of course. All the teams I root for lose. So strange. Then I sat on the back deck with Meg and got a really weird tan line. I watched her eat her salad that had flowers in it. I had to take a photo when it was on the counter before she ate it.

Then I went and hung out with Zach again! He's sorta the best. He laughs at my bad jokes. We went and watched Costa Rica v Greece at this cool food park thing. He told me what it was called, and I don't remember. Its basically a bunch of food carts surrounding TVs and seating. He snagged us some prime seats inside a big gazebo and we watched the game unfold. Naturally, the team I was rooting for lost. Blah blah... But it was so fun anyway. Then we had time to kill, so we watched the Lego movie. HAHA. It was so ridiculous. We watched the entire thing. Ordered pizza. Headed out to go support our friend Connor who is in the hospital trying to combat a pretty nasty case of pneumonia. The worst. I worry about him. He'll be okay. Sad. 

Then it was time for me to hit the ol' dusty trail.... Headed back up the hill to my safe perch. Overlooking everything and viewing it all from a safe distance. I love it up here but I would rather be in San Francisco right now. Probably because I had so much fun, I just wanna keep having more fun. I guess Zach just gets it. 

My fat cat Anouk is waiting for me to go to bed. I'm almost done. 

I want to know where to find wild blueberries? How do I not know? I love blueberries. I just inhaled probably way too many just now. I couldn't stop. I'll add that to my list of things to do. 

- Find wild blueberries

- Eat wild blueberries

- Be satisfied

I also really need this happy blueberry thing:

LA...

so i went to LA for 5 days.

for my overview on my trip to mexico. got the lowdown and the need-to-know details. figured out my ride down (headed down in a 2011 subaru outback, style!) and learned that my trip will be made into a documentary by PJ Palmer - which i find appropriate. because cameras dont bother me... most of the time. 

i also did some other things on my trip ... went to the natural history museum with tayler. went and visited my cousin Ali and she did my nails. went to hollywood with brent & holly who are visiting from england. went back to hollywood to go to an awesome show. went to disneyland with two babe'n dudes. and all around... had a good time. 

me at the natural history museum 

the north american animals hall.. 

the only place that wasnt crawling with kids

The Koren Friendship Bell / Fort MacArthur / Seal Sanctuary

in San Pedro. I'd play basketball here any day. 

Hollywood Sign in Bronson Park

& Holly holding a piece of wood.... clever!

Iron Man was protecting me from Brent .. 

I really wish it was Robert Downey Jr in there... sigh... 

Kenneth... the lost boy... 

Kodii ... the funny boy...

showin off our style 

he made me the spoon ring i now wear on my right hand

the one ring to rule them all 

oh hey

i was so close to going to bed just now

but then i remembered i need to write more. 

for a few reasons. 

i sort of forgot what i was going to say.

but i remember one thing.

 everyone wants something else. everyone wishes they looked the way another person did. or had something someone else has. or wishes they could change something about themselves easier. i dont care if you lie and say "no i like everything about myself" or whatever bullshit spews from your mouth on this particular subject. because i'll know you're lying. its human nature. it just is. i swear it. i'll find some kind of specialist just to prove it. 

discipline. self acceptance. benevolence... and all those of things... we need those things, but damn its hard to get those. especially with all this social media and networking and constant overload of photos. im soooo guilty in participating in it. but hey, its 2012. whatevs. its hard for me not to sometimes hate the way i look after i see a girl with a really good looking body, or who is taking the time and effort to eat really well, or who -seems- comfortable in her own skin. it just makes me wonder what the hell im missing. 

personally, i have almost zero discipline. i eat in 5 minutes like its going to be taken away from me forever. i have a gym membership but i get lazy and think of a million reasons to ditch. i put off doing things i know i need to do because id rather sleep or something. i honestly i have no clue how to gain discipline. plus i know that i am the worst at being almost 100% unresponsive to threats, comments or 'encouragement' to do things to better myself. i'm super good at avoiding things. 

and self acceptance. ha wow. yeah that is not fully happening for me. i must be doing something waaaay wrong. maybe its the above statement i just made that contributes to this. i think the rust just came off the wheels in my mind on this particular subject. i can sort of feel them turning and figuring it out a little bit. hm. but still. hard to do. 

and benevolence. i dont really know how i can get over 'envying' girls with better things than me. i mean, i dont actually envy them at all, i just dont have a better word for it. envy and jealousy are not feelings i am familiar with really. however, i do get down on myself when i see a girl with a lucky set of attributes that i completely lack. so its not really envy... its just self pity and crap. total nonsense - i know. POOR ME. im soooo unworthy... 

but sometimes , everyonce in a while, something about myself satisfies me for a minute. and i realize for a brief flicker in my life that i am not half bad and that i could look like a wreck. more of a wreck than normal that is. like today i did some neat eye make up and i was completely stoked on the photo that i took of myself. i was like WHAT how did i manage that and how did i not know that my eye ball looked that good today.  here is a photo: 

it made me feel good about myself. its kind of like a really pathetic way of validating myself. because most of the time i feel like i look really haggard, unkempt and unhealthy. ::: confessions of a 23 , almost 24 year old optician. ::: i dont consider myself 'pretty' when i see all these really pretty girls all around me. and then i pass myself in the mirror and its like good lord how i have not gotten beat up yet. i dont think i'm a total loss, but i think i'm acceptable. am i being vain? me me me me me. I I I I I . i sound like such a chick right now. i gotta stop. 

so i think i probably loose like half of my readers when i post incredibly long blog posts. i'm not really sure. i always feel like im rambling. it try to keep it interesting. i was thinking of stopping right now. but i still have stuff to say. so you'll just have to deal with it. 

i'm craving rice lately. 

i recently had probably the best meal ive ever had ever. 

its called the righteous rice bowl and its from cosmic cafe downtown hangtown. best choice i ever made ... (second to my choice of peanut butter panda puffs with vanilla coconut milk, NOM) . 

basically what it is is this: brown basmati rice, balsamic beans, sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cheese & avocado. -- it also comes with salsa, cilantro & cilantro sour cream , but i hate cilantro & salsa is like a hit and miss thing for me -- so basically its healthy, filling, delicious and nutritious. 

i hope your mouth is watering. i am so excited to go to work 

tomorrow so i can eat my left overs for lunch. for real. 

AND lastly, i saw that once in a life time solar eclipse. and it was probably the weirdest experience ever. mostly because i was thinking about it pretty deep and i also felt super strange when it happened. i felt really funky. must be something to it. i'll research it later. but i was also just thinking about how badass it is that all i had to do was look up and have some ghetto rigged devices to view it and bam, history was witnessed by me. i did drive up to tahoe and hit up east shore for the event , just to make it extra special. but really i could have stayed home and checked it out all the same. its just cool to me how this happened where i could see it. i think only oregon, california, the southern parts of nevada, utah, northern arizona and new mexico and then parts of texas could see it . oh and some of china and all of japan. thats like, a lot of other places that didnt get to see it. so it was really , miraculous. i went up with one of my best friends brooke. it was such a great time. here we are , and here is the views we came across.... after these photos i am signing off and checking out until next time. thanks for reading. oh and if you made it this far, you are allowed to comment. you dont need an account to comment. just sign your name so i dont get a billion anonymous comments. it makes me think to hard and i cant deal with that. 

adios. 

the ring of fire on my hand

me in the forest 

brooke and i viewing the eclipse. 

we had polarized sunglasses on too

brooke and i in the woods

brooke on the beach

my trusty car in the woods

 

the most beautiful scene to lay my eyes on before heading up

etsy

my etsy :

sold items to ....

5 different countries
21 different states
81 different cities
and....
lots and lots of amazing , people that i am so so grateful toward !

with out all my beautiful, supportive (& not to mention tasteful, obviously) customers
i wouldn't be able to continue doing what i LOVE !
i know i've been so slacking and falling behind on updating my shop
but i promise i'll get better at giving you all what you want. (which lately, seems to be rainbow items... i dig your styles... i love rainbows too)

i'm pretty proud of myself
i've been open since 2008
but but i've only been heavily listing/selling since 2010
i was very inactive from 2008-2010
so im very pleased with my work and so thankful toward those who have helped me
(thanks to Cal Collins who made my most recent banner)

just so satisfied right now.

MY ETSY 

CINNAMONNYMPH

Roux Skei

so my kitten Roux has been missing for exactly a week today - very very very sad. i've been stressed out & depressed for a whole week about it. she is only 10 months old. she is my best friend. i call for her every day multiple times. i posted up LOST CAT fliers everywhere, i asked every single neighbor, i went searching for her, called & checked in at each animal shelter/pound .... nothing.

two of my friends who are animal intuitive's have been giving me feedback & yesterday they both felt that roux was at peace and no longer alive....

super super sad. and i hope its not true. i miss her so much.

she was my 22nd birthday present. i looked for an entire week at tons of ads for kittens and i picked HER! my little tiny, semi-cross eyed, kind of retarded, fearless, playful, LOUD, mischievous, random, hilarious, bent whiskered kitty ROUX SKEI. i love her so much ! please send the best vibes you can spare to give me to have my baby kitten come back home to me!

4th of july weekend

summer time ~

me 'n my main girl

i'm bad at blogging.

not much to say it seems.. i don't know whats significant enough to write. i've been in utah for almost 2 weeks. just got back to california. having two homes is rough. i love utah & california so much. so different from each other. i need more friends in utah tho. because i have so many friends in california and i love having friends over and meeting up with them etc. i need that in utah too. i'm tired .

i'm craving salmon . & i want to go kayaking .

OH !! hey .... went on a hot air balloon ride this weekend! it was incredible ! i loved it sooooo much , it was beautiful. we took some photos , as best we could. but i was so happy to do this! everyone knows its been one of my dreams to do it. it was everything i expected. peaceful, beautiful, thrilling, FUN, & lovely.

me & mitch

after landing , deflating the balloon

the view from the air over park city with

another hot air balloon in the distance

i miss utah . cant wait to head back. WISH ME LUCK.

this is a huge blog post . its HOT in california. am i ready for summer ? i hope.

southern california vacation

so i got back from my 7 day vacation with my boy & girl - mitch & payton. we stayed at mitch's sisters house with her family . they are so wonderful and welcoming! i really loved it. we went to the beach, universal studios, disneyland and did so many other fun things. it was such a sweet fun filled vacation and i am so happy. i love my little family so much ! here are some photos from the trip ...

first day at the beach

mitch & i's date day - went to olvera street

roller blading champions ....

we went to universal studios too

super cheesey photo of us in front of the universal studios globe

payton & i laughing because we were tickling

disneyland ! she was tired at first... so no smiles.

but once we got into the park she was so excited !

her "1st visit" pin !

(that i had to wear all day because she didn't like how big it was)

she loved meeting minnie

& ariel of course

pay , dad & cheshire cat

she loved her cotton candy ...

and we shared ! perfect way to end the disneyland experience !

but now that i'm back here in northern california, my body is sore, my back hurts, my mind is restless and i miss the guts outta payton & mitch ! its sad. can't wait to go back to utah... *sigh*

california

so i touched down in sunny california last saturday . it was about 60 degrees. and it was confusing because.. its january. blue clear skies and rays of sunshine? the family working in the garden? people in shorts? flip flops? t-shirts? where are the boots, jackets and jeans? yeah california is WEIRD!

i just miss mitch & payton. in the spring i want to bring them here. they'd love love love it. its so free and open here . hills and forests. secret areas and good eats. its just nice. i need to discover utah more and uncover the cool parts and the good eats and the free areas. i just get so lost there still... haha .

so ive just been takin it easy while bein here. nothing fancy. just catching up on my sleep, saw a couple good pals. loungin around this house. and snuggling my cat anouk .. who loves me still so much. we love each other. anouk sel dean. shes chasing a ping pong ball right now and i just took a picture of her 'stalking it' .. check it out :

i havent taken any pictures really since ive been here. i took some pictures of the cats. cause im a cat lady. today im hanging out with audra and jackie and we are gonna take pictures then. it'll be fun. i think we are going to coloma to explore.

not gonna lie.. i can't wait to back to utah to my little family and sleep in my own bed and hug my mitch. even tho utah isnt so pretty right now its still gonna be soo good to be back. well. see ya/.